:)

Lyrics | Regina Spektor - The Call lyrics

stuffige

Currently listening to:

So... I have been doing a lot of thinking! -I know strange huh? 

I have been thinking about where my life is going...
I want to be thankful for what I have
I want to be satisfied with Christ alone

But then my friends start getting married.
They seem so happy looking in eachothers eyes.

I think of the time spent in pain trying to find the love that was looming within

trying to find a place where maybe today i could fit in

but as my looking turns to despair

I see his face

I look into his hurting eyes

as blood trickles down his face

he smiles longingly

wearing a crown of thorns

He paid my price at the cross

and every time i sin i feel like i bring him back

then I happily embrace his bleeding body

as he walks with me along the treacherous pathway of life

I would love to say im totally satisfied in Christ alone

and I AM

... but im not fully happy

My heart wishes for a companion

to walk beside on the pathway pursuing God together

My brain exploded words on the wall

2nd best

always not cool enough for you

why do i even try anymore

when all you do is shut the door

I have been hurt to many times before

and my bruises are still sore

Its sad to think you wouldn't care if i left

- - -

PET PEVE

If you say you will meet with me

and then something comes up help me to see

your not just ignoring 

let me know 

please?

* * *

Im stuck in the middle of everyones lives

I like to know things 

but they dont care about me

im just a wall

that interacts as they talk

I blurt in uhuh, okays, and yep i get it 

only to get... nuthing in return

The boys that talk to me

like other girls

they need to vent

and supposedly im a good listener

altho as i clean their guts from my clothing

I stop and think how i wished a guy liked me like that

I dont like the boys that talked to me like that

we are friends and friends is all we will ever be

I want a guy that wants to be with me for who i am 

and not how I submit, shut my mouth and listen to your problems

Sometimes i wonder where God is leading me in life

and why all the things happen the way they do

I wonder why people lie just to see people's reactions

when really the people they are hurting the most is themselves

and God who paid for their sin

I cant help but wonder what is going thru their heads

as they sit there and laugh like everything is 

*~*~*~

My heart aches for the people that don't understand the true meaning of 

christmas

easter

and Christian.

Peeps are so stuck in their ways 

the people that want to help them are 

put into hazardous situations

because peeps dont think anyone should tell THEM how to live

OH NO... Peeps dont think they could ever do anything wrong

and when confronted they fight... for what they think is right and travel the path that leads to regret!

# # #

Family Drain

I find it sad

that people that love you the most

are the people you push away the most

the little time you have with them

should be cherished and embraced

but instead its spent complaining 

about when it will be over

the foul language spills out of her mouth

like the glaciers running south

lost in the pit of shame

with only me to blame

I know better than to be like this

but fighting the pattern is hard to fix

Im sorry

Dont worry what people think

Poof there it is...

annoyance stirs in a dark corner of my heart

Begs me to ponder the things of this life

the ways and the water 

that part like the sea

There shouldn't be diversion 

in you and me

I want to scream out 

I want to say no

but all i keep hearing is 

the repetition of the voice 

over & over & over

in 

my 

mind

then... gets lost in the blur

 better

 wiser

smarter?

do you got me

ALL 

FIGURED 

OUT

The utter superiority is 

Driving me away

Ramblings

God has laid a lot on my heart lately!

My lack on patience is getting me in trouble. 

I was convicted of lack of focus 

God showed me the process i follow, over and over again.. that causes me to drift from God.

I PRAYED

 *Jesus, I am so sorry that i continue to sin, because each time i bring you back to the cross*

My eyes had seen to much...

My old  self was full of sin.  

Jesus interrupted my thoughts...

{MY CHILD I LOVE YOU}

I DESTROYED that 

IF........I try to REBUILD what i DESTROYED

I continue to sin

~*~*~*~*~

I died to the law to live for Christ